When I look at the state of the world today, I often wonder "What the heck is going on here?"
In regards to the recent debates about gun laws and marriage and health care etc., I can't help but feel like we as Americans think we know what's best. In addition, our government thinks it knows what's best for us. But what happens when the two disagree? A government SHOULD try to discern and take steps that are in the direction which is best for its people... but what if its people demand things that are actually contrary to what is best for them? Is the best approach to "give the people what they want" and let them see how it will blow up in their faces ten, twenty, fifty years down the road? The other option seems to be to make decisions which the people disagree with, risk a civil war or something ridiculous of the like, and hope for the best? Both situations leave something to be desired.
Basically, I suppose the question is: How do you govern a nation full of sinners?
One of the consequences of the fall of man (in the garden of Eden) is that we try to make ourselves like God... and then we try to tell ourselves we made the right decision in trying to make ourselves like God. It's all very confusing. I think that none of us know what is best for us... and those who might have a better understanding of what's best for us are sorely outnumbered.
The solution? Inviting souls to know Jesus: the Man who does know what's best for us, who gave His life on a Cross fighting for our salvation. Communication with the Blessed Trinity. Prayer and sacrifice. Honesty, humility. patience.
St. Rita, patroness of impossible causes, pray for us.
18 January 2013
14 January 2013
Waves of Grace
So... a lot of my big life events happen on Marian Feast Days... pretty cool... right?
In September of 2011, my roommates and I prayed a Novena that ended on the Feast of the Nativity of Mary (8 September) about my placement with FOCUS. On 8 December 2012, I received my placement, which was to serve at Auburn University for another semester (exactly what I wanted/needed.)
This year has been no different. A dear friend of mine was married to her MIDDLE SCHOOL sweetheart on Mary's birthday this year and I was privileged enough to be a bridesmaid in her wedding.
Leading up to the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, I had been asking for the Blessed Mother's intercession in my discernment process, and on her feast day I was offered the job with Fidelity Investments. And as God would have it, my first days is 11 February... which I just found out is the feast of Our Lady of Lourdes.
God's blessings are abundant!
Queen of Patience and Humility, pray for us!
01 January 2013
New Year's Evolutions
If you've been reading my blog for long, you know that I'm not a fan of change. I've recently made some rather large changes in my life and I'm actually beyond excited about them.
The past semester has been extremely difficult and I've had to make some "grown up" decisions that I didn't want to make and didn't feel like I was ready to make, but I made them and I think I'm taking steps in the direction that God is calling me in.
When I look back to New Year's last year, I would NEVER have guessed that I'd be where I am today. So much has happened in the past six months that I never could have dreamed up or planned, but I have tried to seek God's will through all of it. There were times when I felt like God was dropping unidentifiable hints as to what He wanted me to do, and I was fearful of making the "wrong" decision and being punished by Him. (Now more than ever, it sounds ridiculous and irrational.) I learned that God doesn't MAKE us do anything, and He certainly doesn't try to deceive us when we're seeking Him!
Back in October, I started actively discerning God's will for my future. I began to feel more and more strongly that I wasn't called to be in Southwest Florida and I started looking at all my options. I prayed and prayed and asked a thousand people their opinions and complained and laughed and cried and worried about what to do. (Is discernment always so stressful? Maybe when I become holier it will get easier.) A friend told me that I was unable to make the decision because God wasn't asking me to make it just yet, and that I would have the grace to make the decision when the time came to make the decision. On December 12th, the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, I was offered an incredible opportunity with Fidelity Investments. At that point, God had closed all of the other doors, all of the other decisions were no longer options, so I went through the open door and accepted the position, no stress, only excitement.
Next week, I am moving home to Southlake to begin my finance career at Fidelity in February. (Isn't it crazy/awesome that the company is called Fidelity?! God is so faithful, even when I'm not!)
I know for a fact that I am and always will be a missionary; all Christians are missionaries by virtue of their Baptism. I also know that being a missionary in the corporate world will be a LOT different from being full time and having Missionary as the job title on my business card.
In this experience, I hope to grow and change into the woman that God has made me to be. I want to take chances and be bold in my efforts to make Christ known to those around me. I want to become holy, and make prayer my first priority in everything. I want to grow in the virtues of patience and humility.
As I begin this new journey, please keep me in your prayers. My goal is to start posting more frequent blog posts on my experiences as a "Real World Catholic." These posts will hold me accountable to evangelizing in little ways, and I hope to share with you my failures and my successes. Will you come along for the ride?
Mary, Queen of Heaven and Earth, Mother of God, pray for us!
P.S. One of the things I've found myself doing recently: when I hear or see someone say (or type) something sarcastic about Mary or use one of Her titles in vain ( Sweet Mother of God! Holy Mother! etc.) I stop to think about how sweet She really is. It makes me forget to be mad at the person who just insulted Her, and remember to think about how lovely she is! It's so fun, you should try it!
The past semester has been extremely difficult and I've had to make some "grown up" decisions that I didn't want to make and didn't feel like I was ready to make, but I made them and I think I'm taking steps in the direction that God is calling me in.
When I look back to New Year's last year, I would NEVER have guessed that I'd be where I am today. So much has happened in the past six months that I never could have dreamed up or planned, but I have tried to seek God's will through all of it. There were times when I felt like God was dropping unidentifiable hints as to what He wanted me to do, and I was fearful of making the "wrong" decision and being punished by Him. (Now more than ever, it sounds ridiculous and irrational.) I learned that God doesn't MAKE us do anything, and He certainly doesn't try to deceive us when we're seeking Him!
Back in October, I started actively discerning God's will for my future. I began to feel more and more strongly that I wasn't called to be in Southwest Florida and I started looking at all my options. I prayed and prayed and asked a thousand people their opinions and complained and laughed and cried and worried about what to do. (Is discernment always so stressful? Maybe when I become holier it will get easier.) A friend told me that I was unable to make the decision because God wasn't asking me to make it just yet, and that I would have the grace to make the decision when the time came to make the decision. On December 12th, the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, I was offered an incredible opportunity with Fidelity Investments. At that point, God had closed all of the other doors, all of the other decisions were no longer options, so I went through the open door and accepted the position, no stress, only excitement.
Next week, I am moving home to Southlake to begin my finance career at Fidelity in February. (Isn't it crazy/awesome that the company is called Fidelity?! God is so faithful, even when I'm not!)
I know for a fact that I am and always will be a missionary; all Christians are missionaries by virtue of their Baptism. I also know that being a missionary in the corporate world will be a LOT different from being full time and having Missionary as the job title on my business card.
In this experience, I hope to grow and change into the woman that God has made me to be. I want to take chances and be bold in my efforts to make Christ known to those around me. I want to become holy, and make prayer my first priority in everything. I want to grow in the virtues of patience and humility.
As I begin this new journey, please keep me in your prayers. My goal is to start posting more frequent blog posts on my experiences as a "Real World Catholic." These posts will hold me accountable to evangelizing in little ways, and I hope to share with you my failures and my successes. Will you come along for the ride?
Mary, Queen of Heaven and Earth, Mother of God, pray for us!
P.S. One of the things I've found myself doing recently: when I hear or see someone say (or type) something sarcastic about Mary or use one of Her titles in vain ( Sweet Mother of God! Holy Mother! etc.) I stop to think about how sweet She really is. It makes me forget to be mad at the person who just insulted Her, and remember to think about how lovely she is! It's so fun, you should try it!
13 December 2012
Expect the Unexpected
... should be the motto of the Christian life.
Isn't God always asking us to go way outside of our comfort zones? Sometimes I get frustrated that my life isn't the fairytale I thought it'd be, but as I've been pouring over Scriptures, I have not found anywhere that Jesus said that following Him would be easy! Go figure! At least He's honest!!
This Advent, He has been preparing my heart to receive Him in radical new ways.
I've been able to see a lot of my past failures in a new light. Instead of being disappointed with myself for not achieving some ridiculous standard I set for myself, I'm asking the Lord to show me how I've disappointed Him. I'm learning that the line between relativism and being judgmental is very fine, and I've fallen on both sides at different times.
I'm learning about how universal our Church really is and how beautiful it is that God works through all people at all times to draw us near to Him. I've always been comfortable with His love for me, but I'm learning to love His love for humanity as a whole. How reckless and beautiful is His Love?!
I've found in myself a deep longing for Heaven. Sure, the Earth is great and all, and for the most part, I like it here ;) but I know that it's not what I was made for! I think the idea of eternity is incomprehensible for us who are in mortal bodies (how can a three dimensional creature conceive of a fourth dimension?), but C.S. Lewis and many other authors describe it as more real than our current reality. That's comforting for me, especially in modern times when reality is often scripted and fake. Truth always wins though!
I hope that my heart and yours can truly be a resting place for Him this Advent Season!
In the new calendar year, I plan on being a more active part of the blogosphere, and my blogs will probably be more interesting, so stay tuned!
Our Lady of Guadalupe, Queen of the Americas, and Saint Lucy, pray for us!
Isn't God always asking us to go way outside of our comfort zones? Sometimes I get frustrated that my life isn't the fairytale I thought it'd be, but as I've been pouring over Scriptures, I have not found anywhere that Jesus said that following Him would be easy! Go figure! At least He's honest!!
This Advent, He has been preparing my heart to receive Him in radical new ways.
I've been able to see a lot of my past failures in a new light. Instead of being disappointed with myself for not achieving some ridiculous standard I set for myself, I'm asking the Lord to show me how I've disappointed Him. I'm learning that the line between relativism and being judgmental is very fine, and I've fallen on both sides at different times.
I'm learning about how universal our Church really is and how beautiful it is that God works through all people at all times to draw us near to Him. I've always been comfortable with His love for me, but I'm learning to love His love for humanity as a whole. How reckless and beautiful is His Love?!
I've found in myself a deep longing for Heaven. Sure, the Earth is great and all, and for the most part, I like it here ;) but I know that it's not what I was made for! I think the idea of eternity is incomprehensible for us who are in mortal bodies (how can a three dimensional creature conceive of a fourth dimension?), but C.S. Lewis and many other authors describe it as more real than our current reality. That's comforting for me, especially in modern times when reality is often scripted and fake. Truth always wins though!
I hope that my heart and yours can truly be a resting place for Him this Advent Season!
In the new calendar year, I plan on being a more active part of the blogosphere, and my blogs will probably be more interesting, so stay tuned!
Our Lady of Guadalupe, Queen of the Americas, and Saint Lucy, pray for us!
10 November 2012
Suffering and Sacrifice
In light of Veteran's Day, I've been seeing a lot of commercials on television encouraging the American public to support our troops. They show moving clips of soldiers training, working on the front lines, and even coming home and surprising their families. In one of the World Series games, a veteran threw out the first pitch. As the announcer told his story, I was actually moved to tears.
I think about how grateful I am for the men and women who literally risk their lives for my freedom. I am so humbled by their sacrifice.
On the other hand, I think of the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross, and how often when I glance at a crucifix, I am filled with no emotions at all. I've become accustomed to the bloody suffering of Christ's Passion and Death.
I hope that Jesus will recognize that even when I am filled with no emotions at all, I choose to love Him by just showing up, day in and day out, to do His mission. When I am moved by the sacrifices of U.S. Vets, I pray that Jesus will unite their sacrifices to His.
St. Jude, Pray for our troops!
I think about how grateful I am for the men and women who literally risk their lives for my freedom. I am so humbled by their sacrifice.
On the other hand, I think of the ultimate sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross, and how often when I glance at a crucifix, I am filled with no emotions at all. I've become accustomed to the bloody suffering of Christ's Passion and Death.
I hope that Jesus will recognize that even when I am filled with no emotions at all, I choose to love Him by just showing up, day in and day out, to do His mission. When I am moved by the sacrifices of U.S. Vets, I pray that Jesus will unite their sacrifices to His.
St. Jude, Pray for our troops!
03 September 2012
Hanging by the Thread of His Grace
Well, ladies and gentlemen, "they" were right. "They" told me that Florida Gulf Coast University is an extremely difficult campus to serve on, and "they" were right. "They" also told me that I could handle it, so let's hope "they" are two for two!
I have been a resident of Florida for a few weeks now, and while I feel settled in, it hasn't been an easy adjustment. I'm learning my way around, meeting new people, and beginning Bible Studies and Discipleships THIS WEEK! Discipleship is the absolute heart of our mission (because it was the heart of Christ's mission), and I am excited to have some sense of normalcy back in my life. The women I will be discipling this year are great and I can't wait to grow closer to our Lord with them.
The thing I've learned repeatedly since I've been here is that God doesn't want any small part of me. He doesn't want the good, the great, or the exciting. He doesn't want the things I'm good at or the things I like. He wants all of me. All the bad, the ugly, the attitude, the indignant, and the pride. I'm trying to give Him what He wants from me: everything. I've learned that He doesn't need me! Nothing I do is good unless He makes it good, and sometimes He can use my failures better than my successes. This is a hard lesson to learn.
Last week, one day when I was praying my Holy Hour, I came before Him, yet again, having royally screwed up, realizing once again that my pride had taken a complete hold of me. I told Him I was sorry and that I didn't want to do things my way anymore, only His.
I used to honestly think that I could stand up by myself, that I could walk and even run on my own. Now I realize that if I can stand it is ONLY because I am lifted up by the Cross of Christ. I am literally hanging by the thread of His grace.
St. Gregory, pray for us!
I have been a resident of Florida for a few weeks now, and while I feel settled in, it hasn't been an easy adjustment. I'm learning my way around, meeting new people, and beginning Bible Studies and Discipleships THIS WEEK! Discipleship is the absolute heart of our mission (because it was the heart of Christ's mission), and I am excited to have some sense of normalcy back in my life. The women I will be discipling this year are great and I can't wait to grow closer to our Lord with them.
The thing I've learned repeatedly since I've been here is that God doesn't want any small part of me. He doesn't want the good, the great, or the exciting. He doesn't want the things I'm good at or the things I like. He wants all of me. All the bad, the ugly, the attitude, the indignant, and the pride. I'm trying to give Him what He wants from me: everything. I've learned that He doesn't need me! Nothing I do is good unless He makes it good, and sometimes He can use my failures better than my successes. This is a hard lesson to learn.
Last week, one day when I was praying my Holy Hour, I came before Him, yet again, having royally screwed up, realizing once again that my pride had taken a complete hold of me. I told Him I was sorry and that I didn't want to do things my way anymore, only His.
I used to honestly think that I could stand up by myself, that I could walk and even run on my own. Now I realize that if I can stand it is ONLY because I am lifted up by the Cross of Christ. I am literally hanging by the thread of His grace.
St. Gregory, pray for us!
20 August 2012
First Impressions
Last week, I moved down to Fort Myers, Florida to serve the students at Florida Gulf Coast University.
It is definitely a culture shock and a big change. The humidity doesn't do much for my hair, but that's alright. (All things are vanities! Ecclesiastes 1:2)
I have a feeling God is going to show me a lot of new things about Him and about myself this year, so please keep me in your prayers.
St. Jude, pray for us.
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