I miss arguing.
And no, not in the Taylor Swift's "I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, it's two a.m. and I'm cursing your name" way, although as I think back to some of my dysfunctional relationships (see previous posts), that did used to feel like fun to me.
Let me explain.
In college I had the opportunity to be friends with some really amazing people. They were so intelligent, well read, and good-intentioned, and best of all, they cared about things that mattered. And they cared about my soul. And I love them.
The summer after my Sophomore year, I hung around Auburn for the summer. A few friends and I would frequently find ourselves in these deep conversations that would last for hours into the night. We would pull all the couches together in the Lower Center (the Catholic Campus Ministry Building) and sit around talking and debating and arguing and laughing. Sometimes it was very serious and sometimes it was light. We joked around and called our little weekly tradition the Fireside Chats. But there wasn't a fire... I don't think. I remember feeling so intellectually stimulated, even more so than any of my classes at the University ever allowed. I was coming off of this really intense emotional relationship with Jesus. I think it's like that in the beginning for most people. But that was over and I was on to the more serious stuff and I read everything I could get my hands on about the Trinity, the Church, and especially about Theology of the Body. Between encyclicals, Bible Studies, news articles, blogs, etc., I hardly even had time for my literary love: historical fiction.
Sometimes in my job, I miss being intellectually stimulated. I like helping my clients achieve their goals, but often I miss the economic theory behind finance. I also enjoy behavioral finance (studying why people do the things they do in the market) and more big picture questions like "what effect does population have on the economy," etc. Right now my job is such a micro piece of the puzzle, and when it comes down to it, I'm really a big picture thinker.
I also miss the theological arguments that I used to have. From college to FOCUS, most people around me were either right out of college or still in college. I love discussing different literary classics and seeing how someone's worldview can differ based on their circumstances. In the Lower Center all those nights, we argued because we all had something tangible at stake: our own ideas of how the world works. I love people, and I love knowing why they think what they think. No one wants to have an hour long conversation with their financial advisor about why they're making the decisions that they are within their financial plan. Instead they just want to talk to me for ten minutes, ask me what investments they should be in, implement, and be on their way.
I guess really a good solution to this is for me to read more. But there's just so little time, so much to do. And also Netflix. AHHHHH.
St. Thomas Aquinas, pray for us!
I miss arguing, too. Why is it that people no longer care as much about finding the truth when they get older?
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